Mar 26

Reauthorization of the Violence Against Women Act includes LGBT domestic violence survivors

Reauthorization of the Violence Against Women Act includes LGBT domestic violence survivors

The bill would also provide funding for programs that serve those in the LGBT community who experience domestic violence, and prohibit discrimination in funding based on gender.

“Is the violence any less real, is the danger any less real because you happen to be gay or lesbian? I don’t think so,” said Sen. Dianne Feinstein, a Democrat from California.

Thank you, Sen. Feinstein. While I support the idea of the anti-violence bill, this particular point made me sit up and take notice. Just because a man is gay doesn’t mean he can’t be abused. Just because a woman is a lesbian doesn’t mean she is safe from being abused.

Center for American Progress survey estimates 30 percent of same-sex partnerships experience domestic violence.

How sad is this. Like we don’t have enough trouble with outside haters, we have to worry about our own. And, sadly, you can’t just look at someone and know if they are or will turn into an abuser.

I’m also glad that the wording means that men can get help because just as a woman can abuse a woman, she can abuse a man as well. Sad but true. I’ve known a couple of men that could have used this kind of legal support. Both were ashamed to admit to being abused. As men they thought it made them look weak or that no one would believe them. Luckily for them, they had friends that stood up and by them when they finally decided to escape both the physical and emotional pain their partners put them through.

Please support bills like this, and the senators that vote for the bill. Also, and more importantly, if you or a friend/loved one is suffering abuse, get help. There are programs and community support. If not in your area then look to your friends for help. No one should be hurt, mentally, emotionally, or physically. Ever!

About the author


Tempeste O’Riley grew up in the deep south and escaped her conservative, oppressive roots as soon as she could. Tempe is an out and proud omnisexual/bi-woman whose best friend growing up had the courage to do what she couldn’t – defy the hate and come out. He has been her hero ever since.

Though new to writing M/M, she has done many things in her life but writing has always drawn her back – no matter what else life has thrown her way. She counts her friends, family, and Muse as her greatest blessings in life.


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  1. Jennifer Lowery (Kamptner)

    Great post. We should definitely speak out against abuse.

    1. TempeO

      Thanks Jennifer.
      Sadly, abuse is a genderless issue but this bill goes a long way to helping all genders and sexualities.

  2. Daryl Devore

    Important post – hope lots of people drop in a read it. Good job.

    1. TempeO

      Thank you Daryl.
      Having seen too much abuse and having suffered it personally, this topic is close to my heart.

  3. ebondreams

    Thank you for sharing this post. Very informative.


    1. TempeO

      Thank you Nichelle.

  4. Lia Davis

    Great post! You are so correct. Abuse doesn’t care about gender.

    1. TempeO

      Abuse doesn’t care but at least now people are admitting that. Too many men and women’s pain has been ignored because of this very issue.

  5. Brenda

    I have known men who have been abused–not physically but mentally. It made me so sad because most people would never recognize it. And even if they did, they would never say a word.

    What a great and important post!

    1. TempeO

      Sadly, I know men that have been physically abused and both were so ashamed to admit their “weakness” that at first they refused to admit the abuse. What was even worse was that even when they did, no one wanted to take them seriously – no one legally. Thankfully they had good friends that helped them escape.
      Thanks for visiting, Brenda.

  6. ellaquinnauthor

    Great post. Gender and/or preference are no protection against abuse.

    1. TempeO

      Well put. It is no protection, nor is it an indicator. Abuse sees no gender, sexuality, socio-economic, etc boundaries.
      Thank you for your visit.

  7. caseamajor

    In college I volunteered at the battered women’s shelter. It was a real eye opener. Oddly enough, I also have a friend whose first wife stabed him in the eye with an ice pick. It is genderless. Brutality is and equal opportunity evil.

    1. TempeO

      Good for you, Casea. Volunteering is such a needed thing, sadly.
      In the eye? Did he survive? (did she?)
      Sad, but true. While people and society in general can’t seem to figure out true equality, hate and abuse seems to.

  8. Maggie O'Malley

    Great post. Descrimination needs to be stamped out across the board.

    1. TempeO

      So very true Maggie. Thanks for dropping in

  9. Toni Kelly

    Tempeste, I completely agree with you. After a while, it’s easy to stay down if someone keep punching you (literally and otherwise), which is why it is important to have a support group and to support each other. Nobody deserves abuse.

    1. TempeO

      Thanks Toni.
      It is far to easy to ‘stay down’ as you put it, especially if you fear no one will listen/help/care. Friends and family should be our first support but crisis and legal should have to listen and help too. I’m thrilled with the new additions.

  10. Jenna Jaxon

    Just as sad that abuse knows no age limit. Children and the elderly suffer it as well. The equal-opportunity offender. Excellent post, Tempeste! This is information that needs to get out there. Thanks for spreading the word.

    1. TempeO

      Yes, age is no protection, but at least there are laws and programs for that. Gays, lesbians, and str8 men have all been ignored and shunned from help over gender or sexuality.
      Thank you for stopping in.

  11. Melissa Limoges

    Great post, Tempeste

    1. TempeO

      Thanks for visiting my new site Melissa.

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